parenting

Dealing With Shared Custody During The Holidays

The holidays are supposed to be a happy time but if you are sharing custody of your kids they can quickly become a time of frustration and disappointment. Dividing up time with the kids during the holidays is rough because both families want to have time with them and often holiday parties and other events cut into one parent’s time and switches need to be made. After years of dealing with holiday custody frustration here are a few tips I’ve learned to make sharing custody of your kids with your ex easier during the stressful holiday time: Be Flexible You both know what the custody agreement is so don’t throw that in the other parent’s face. Instead be flexible and be willing to make deals when it comes to custody. If your ex really wants to take the kids to see their grandparents on Christmas Eve let them even though Christmas Eve is your night with them. Just move your holiday celebration to the next day. Or vice versa. Remember that the goal is to make sure that your kids have a nice holiday and get to see their family members and spend time with them. It’s not about winning or beating your ex. It should be about what will make the kids the happiest. Make Your Time Special You may not get your kids on Christmas Day, or even on Christmas Eve. But you can make the time that you have with them feel special anyway. Take them ice skating or take them out for hot chocolate or take them to go see the holiday displays in the storefronts. Anything that you can think of to make the holiday fun and special. Even if you don’t have custody on the actual holiday the kids will remember the holiday time they had with you fondly. And that’s what matters. Coordinate With Your Ex About Presents Giving presents can be a nightmare for parents who are split up. If you told the kids they can’t have a new console gaming system. Your ex buys them one then you are the bad guy if you take it away. But if you give the kids new phones. And your ex also got them phones on their phone plan that can be a disaster too. It’s very important that you talk to your ex. Set some ground rules when it comes to giving gifts to the kids. And both of you need to abide by the rules that you set and make sure that your parents do also. Let each set of grandparents know what rules you and the ex have decided on when it comes to Christmas gifts. Asks them to please respect the rules so that peace and harmony can be maintained. Don’t Badmouth Your Ex You should never say bad things about your ex in front of your kids, but during the holiday season when you’re frustrated with changing schedules and other problems you might be tempted to let something negative slip. Don’t. That is not helpful for anyone and it’s not good for your kids.

Relationship

6 Sweet Steps to Make Your Wife Happy

Make time for your wife and make her feel the luckiest woman on the world. Women are very easy to please. It takes very little for them to feel special and loved. They do not require expensive or flashy things in order to appreciate your efforts. Spend quality time with her despite your busy schedule. Strengthen your relationship and make your wife happy in the simplest ways. Here are 6 sweet steps to make time for your partner in marriage: Greet Her in the Morning Remember to notice her first thing in the morning. Make her feel wanted with the way you kiss her when you wake up. That slight brush of your lips on her cheeks is one of the sweetest things you can do for her despite her just-woke-up face. Put Her in Your Schedule She knows that you’re working for your future and she understands that you may be quite loaded most of the time. If you put her in between your busy schedule, you make her feel like an important part of your priorities. Call her in the middle of the day and check on her or take her to lunch whenever you have an office downtime. Let her know that you remember her while you’re both away. Take Her on a Date It doesn’t have to be in a fancy restaurant. You can just even take her to your own kitchen, cook for her and spend that meal with her. Unlike those hasty and quick moments, put your attention on her in that instant. You may not have a lot of chances but make those chances count. Put Down Your Phone Don’t just give her quick glances over your phone. Put it down and listen. She just might be asking about her dress, or what you want to eat for breakfast. Whatever it is, don’t attend to her with your phone in your hand, or in your ears. Talk to Her Remember when you used to talk a lot just about anything when you were still younger and didn’t have heavy problems to solve? Talk to her about anything, again. It doesn’t have to change. You can even talk to her about those problems. She would like to hear about your worries, too. Turn that late-night reading session into an intimate conversation with your wife. Say Goodnight Before your day ends, say goodnight to your wife. Let the last thing she remembers about you before she sleeps be your voice speaking gently in her ears. Let her dig into her dreams with your sweet gesture in her memory.